How to Find Meaning During Uncertain Times

In the previous article, “A New Beginning in the Face of Loss,” we discussed the ways that grief impacts our emotional well-being, and how the uncertainty of this current pandemic may pose roadblocks to feeling comfortable about creating a new reality. 

Today we find ourselves in a time of major upheaval and change. While contending with anxieties around the global impact that COVID-19 is having, we are also be grappling to find ways to adjust to a new way of life. For some people, these changes have offered an opportunity for restoration from a constantly moving life. For others, these adjustments have been challenging, and have led to existential feelings. What does all of this loss mean? Why have so many people lost their lives? How will this pandemic impact me and my family? How do I fit in this world? What is my purpose? 

Wrestling with the answers to these questions can be unsettling.  These questions are natural during times of uncertainty and change. If you have been experiencing a sense of meaninglessness and confusion, you aren’t alone. The marked shifts in lifestyle, routine, and work may lead to feelings of being unfulfilled, and having difficulty obtaining a sense of purpose. 

A person’s journey towards a meaningful existence is unique. In this article, I’ll share a few tools and suggestions to help you navigate your journey. I’ll offer insights using philosophical ideas to help answer some of these big questions, and give you practical tips on how to rediscover what gives you a sense of meaning.

The Meaning of Life in ‘Normal’ Times

First of all, let’s take a look at why this pandemic has caused such a widespread loss of meaning. Most of us, whether we know it or not, generate a sense of purpose and meaning from being busy and feeling engaged in the different facets of our lives. 

For some, being engaged in a career provides a sense of meaning.  The purpose is derived from progressing in a chosen career and earning a living to secure financial stability for the present and the future.  

Hobbies and leisure activities also provide a sense of meaning. For some, the ability to meet friends for dinner, go on a hike, go to the gym, go on vacations, and to explore local attractions can contribute to a life that feels meaningful.

Being busy and feeling productive can also provide a sense of meaning. When we feel accomplished about something we did in our day, we feel good about ourselves. For some people, feeling busy and productive is how you define your identity. You may be so used to being busy that you forget to check-in with yourself, and never take the time to ask yourself what your purpose really is.

The current pandemic has changed all of this. We are no longer able to engage with our lives in the ways that we used to, which can leave some feeling uncomfortable, anxious, lost, and uncertain about our purpose. With this new space, you may have started to ask yourself new questions about who you are and what your purpose is. 

Mindfulness and Self-Reflection

So, how can we tackle these new, uncomfortable feelings? One popular method is to use the practice of mindfulness as introduced in Buddhist philosophy. Essentially, the practice of mindfulness is about noticing and accepting one’s current thoughts, feelings, and sensations. The idea is that by acknowledging the realities of the present moment, we can live in a more peaceful state of mind. The acceptance of our present state as something that will come and go allows us to control our desire to over-analyze or panic. 

In mindfulness, we reconnect to ourselves, and, in so doing, we can decipher what we can and cannot control. We can see each moment of our life as a fresh experience that has not yet been lived. When we live consciously and are present, we are more equipped to be in the flow of life energy and face adversity. 

Pema Chodron, a reputable American Tibetan Buddist, noted, 

“You are the sky. Everything else-it’s just the weather.”

The sky represents our lives and the expansive nature of possibility. Emotions and stressors are like the weather that can change from day-to-day. When we are able to observe our emotions like the movement of clouds, we are able to see ourselves with more clarity.  

If we can build our lives being mindful of what we are creating in each moment, we will be able to harness all of our energy for movement, adaptation, and creation. Our influence could be felt so much stronger if we were centered in our approach. Maybe in the face of uncertainty, we can surrender to the fact that our brain plays tricks on us and we will have to unlearn a lot of thought patterns that don’t bring us peace. 

So, how can the practice of mindfulness bring a new sense of meaning to our lives? Well, many practitioners of mindfulness meditation have found that the practice brings them a sense of connectedness to their inner selves and the external world. Dr. Pauline Boss recommends finding meaning, to bring us satisfaction and fulfillment for a peaceful mind during times of uncertainty. As we take time to reconnect to ourselves, practice mindfulness, self-discipline and healing, we will come to a new way of being that is in better alignment with who we truly are and what we want to invite into our future. 

When we acknowledge that we each hold the power to adapt, we begin to lean into change instead of resisting it. Perhaps with this intention, we can make the shifts that we have always been wanting to make but have never had the time. We can hold that we are being forced into a corner, or we can acknowledge that change is not easy, and open the door to an opportunity to build a life with new meaning.  

 Tips on How to Manage Daily Uncertainty

1) Observe Emotions without Judgment 

When you experience distressing emotions, name the emotion, observe it, acknowledge their temporary qualities, and let them go. Acknowledge that emotions can be held without the need to do something with it.  

2) Identify your values

Ask yourself what you value most in your life. Reflect on the ways that you have attempted to move toward your goals, and ask yourself if your goals align with your values. Think about the areas of your life that bring you joy, happiness, levity, and motivation. Reflect on the areas of your life that take more from you than they give. Reflect on the areas of your life that could use a greater understanding of what pulls you to engage with them in the ways that you do.  

3) Resist the Desire to Control 

When we allow ourselves to surrender to things that we cannot control, we allow ourselves to look at the situation, our stressors, and our emotions from many other vantage points. We begin to see the forest behind the trees.

 4) Maintain Social Connections

Bonding together in times of uncertainty can offer strength and challenge feelings of isolation. Use this time to reconnect, check-in, build ties to your community. Social supports offer space to feel like you are not alone in what you’re holding. They offer a space for hope, validation, resilience, & inspiration.

5) Create a New Routine 

Get creative with a new routine. Practice different ways that you can establish a work, personal, family time routine that works for you and your family. Occupy your mind by learning new skills, and engaging in areas of interest that you have never had time for. 

6) Focus on the Three Essentials - Sleep, Food, and Exercise

Spend more time finding ways to take care of your basic needs. Get the sleep that you have always wanted. Identify the eating and working regimens that work for you. Acknowledge the goals that you achieve. 

I am currently offering telehealth support services to all California residents. Please give me a call today to obtain a free 20-minute consultation to see if telehealth support sessions could be supportive for you.